Sometimes...

Sometimes... I wish I was by myself, all alone, with no other person nearby to intrude on my solitude.
Sometimes... I wish I understood those other people better.
Sometimes... I wish they understood me.
Sometimes... I wish I understood me.

I feel like I'll never understand others, and they in turn will never understand me.
I came to college, hoping to find that it would be better than high school, in that I would have the opportunities that I hadn't before, such as the opportunity to study what I was interested in, or the opportunity to meet and become friends with others that were similar to I.
Yet it seems that the more time I spend with these people, the more strained my relationships with them become.
I generally try to avoid antagonizing against people, and while I have been known to annoy people at times, I've gotten better at not doing that, yet nonetheless people slowly but surely begin to dislike, then detest and even hate me, for reasons I have yet to find out, and perhaps I never will.

I hoped college would be better but sometimes I feel that it may be worse, there are times that I actually begin to miss high school if only because there were people there that genuinely thought of me as their friend.

My thoughts are so jumbled now, I'm not really sure anymore of who I am, or where I'm going.
Is the problem with me? or with them? or perhaps with us all?
they say you "find" yourself in college, yet all I've done is become lost
I hear you make your true friends in college, yet I have met no such person
It's almost the end of my second semester, I'm having trouble seeing the light at the end of this tunnel.
as the days go on, I find myself more and more considering transferring among other things
I... don't know what I should do, is this normal? do others experience this same thing as well?
or am I alone in this as well?
will things ever change? will they get worse?

college is such an adjustment, it's hard to believe it's only been a few months, when it feels like I've been here for ages. I hold on to the (perhaps forlorn) hope that this is all only because I people haven't known me long enough to get used to the way that I am, or to get over their first (or second) impressions.
how do others do it? how is it that in such a short time they are able to relate to others here, and even, somehow find a way to not only get along with others, but to really be friends with them, in a more than "passing hello way" (of which all my 'friendships ' here seem like )

it's a little ironic, when I started I loved it here, especially because of the people, I neither missed home, nor my high school. yet now, I find myself desperately hoping for the relief of summer, not just because of the lack of classes, but because I feel that things just might be different after summer.
I dunno...

I'm not sure why I'm here ranting about all this, I just felt that I should in some way or another, discuss this, else I'd probably go crazy. this just seemed to be the proper outlet

If there's anyone out there reading, let me know, I'm curious to see if this thing is actually read by someone, and if you have any comments I'd like to hear them